The Demise of Summer, or How I Scored Ten Dates, But Only Went On Three and Never Got A Second One

Well, in a matter of days, will be off to the Land of Eagles...Albania. Many of you have asked, "Why Albania, John?" Such a thought-provoking question has cornered me in even the deepest, darkest recesses of my mind. My retort to you: "Why NOT Albania?" Granted, many of you have no freaking clue where Albania is. Some of you politico-film buffs tell me that it's an imaginary country that some presidential advisor and filmmaker conceived to divert the nation's attention. For this reason did I decide to sell my copy of Wag The Dog. Nevertheless, I'm sure it will be a fun trip, and I'll be able to give you some insights on their human trafficking and drug problems, but also the great people, the late despot Enver Hoxha, and why they love the Belushi Brothers. For some Albanian info, check out Albanian.com. For Albanian music, give Albasoul a whirl.

Pioneer Days: Smashing good time. Although I didn't go to every event, I was happy to return home for the dances, the parade, the food, and of course the good times with my buddy Kyle. One interesting aspect of the weekend was meeting the newest group of inductees into The Husband Club. There were 40 some odd girls that I graduated High School with, and just four short years later, 22 of them are married. I had the privilege of meeting a handful of these jerks, who scoffed at the mere fact that I've been home from my mission 15 months and am still unmarried. Right. And y'all acted like pricks to me because...??? Gimme a break. It's not like I was ever former competition or anything. Why would I want to marry anyone from my class? There were 100 of us...it'd be like marrying my sister. If I had a sister, that is.

So, summer is over. Nearly, anyway. I guess I can say that it was a good one, despite the fact that the title is absolutely true. I suppose I can't expect too much from girls. It's not like I'll meet the perfect one anytime soon. Over the past year, I've managed to keep the three same girls floating in my head, and I'll be lucky if one of them wants anything to do with me. It's not often that a Liz Phair or Leisel Von Trapp can just walk into my life and change it. You've gotta have patience and faith. Magari ci fosse Heather qui.

Until next time...I'll see you in Shqiperia (That's Albania in Albanian).